Positive self-esteem is very important if not crucial to our happiness and well being as a human being. Having positive self-esteem can make the difference in that which we take on in life, in that which we go about achieving and creating. Having positive self- esteem also allows us to have healthy and joyous relationships with others, to experience true intimacy. One could also assert that having positive self-esteem gives us access to genuine spirituality. Poor self-esteem, on the other hand, creates the space for us to experience a great deal of negativity in life including depression, anxiety, fear, stress and loneliness. Negative or poor self-esteem is also highly correlated with alcohol and drug dependency. Some even believe that a negative or poor self-image is the source of such addictions.

While it appears that the importance of positive self-esteem is somewhat understood, the unanswered question has always been about how to improve or enhance a person’s self-esteem. Some belief that a person’s self-esteem rests upon them being successful, in accomplishing that which they take on in life, of achieving goals that they have set for themselves. As a result much effort is put into assisting others in effectively and efficiently planning their doing in life. Others believe that our sense of self-esteem is determined by the type of relationships that we have, that by surrounding ourselves with positive people who will appreciate and acknowledge us that our esteem will be positively impacted. To this end training is given to help a person improve his interpersonal skills, how he communicates and relates with others. While both of these endeavors are important, it is not the having or doing that creates positive self-esteem. Ones self-esteem is not given or to be obtained from without, external to the person.

One very effective way to improve self-esteem is through the use of positive affirmations. Positive affirmations are very powerful for transforming how a person feels and thinks about himself, ultimately influencing how he views and acts within the world and towards others. The fundamental reason why positive affirmations are so effective is that their nature or structure reflects what already exists in our mind. Our identity or who we think we are, our current thinking patterns, are also a series of affirmations, composed fundamentally of mere words or language. Everything we think, all of the thoughts that we have, are merely affirmations. Positive affirmations, when used consistently, begin to alter our prevalent internal language pattern, as negative as it may be, our inner self talk or dialogue that exists within us. The end result of the consistent use of positive affirmations is the transformation of an inner negative language pattern into one that is positive in nature

The most effective way to use positive affirmations is with the individual’s own voice. While a person can have a beneficial result from listening to a commercially developed product that employs positive affirmations recorded by another, the transformative power of this technology is enhanced or strengthened by the positive messages being delivered in the person’s own voice. By using a person’s own voice to transform the inner dialogue, there is less resistance to the transformational process due to the fact that the voice itself is the same or identical. It is as though the negative voice or language pattern that one hears repeatedly in life is altered or transformed by the consistent exposure and listening to that same voice but with the structure of positive enhancing affirmations. Eventually the structure will transform from one that is negative to one that is positive in nature.

The process of using ones own voice in doing work with positive affirmations can be strengthened with the use of therapeutic relaxation music. While the use of ones own voice is very powerful for creating change in a person’s life, the use of specially designed therapeutic relaxation music assists in creating the audio space for this process to be very powerful. We tend to be more open or suggestible to positive affirmations or language when we are in a state of relaxation. When combined with binaural audio tones the relaxing affect of the therapeutic relaxation music is greatly enhanced. When used with the combined effect of the therapeutic relaxation music and binaural audio tones and consistently, the positive enhancing affirmations that are delivered will have such a profound affect upon improving and transforming a person’s internal, self-talk and eventually his self-esteem.

The technology of utilizing positive affirmations that are recorded in a person’s own voice and therapeutic relaxation music is currently being employed in the treatment of those suffering from substance dependency problems. At the Holistic Addiction Treatment Program in North Miami Beach, Florida, clients are given access to this powerful technology. Clients have the ability to create personal affirmations that empower them and support their recovery and also are able to record these affirmations. The recorded positive affirmations are then mixed with specially designed therapeutic relaxation music to create a powerful audio product to assist the individual in his recovery. Once created the client is trained in the most effective manner in which to utilize their personal CD as part of their overall recovery plan. Those clients who utilize this powerful technology tend to improve their self- esteem, stay in recovery and improve the quality of their life in general. When a person feels and thinks more positively about himself he tends to be more positive towards everything that he is taking on in his life, including and most importantly his recovery.

Harry Henshaw, Ed.D., LMHC



About the Author: Dr Harry Henshaw is in private practice in North Miami Beach, Florida. www.enhancedhealing.com

When creating a system of self discovery, it is important to turn all negative thoughts into positive functional awareness. First it’s important to take a full body inventory to establish all the parts of your body you love, and those you're not so crazy about. After this is accomplished, what happens next?

In this article we'll take a look at the importance of putting all of the body together as one unit; the importance of establishing a total positive body reverence and awareness. All the while however, it is important to remember the ultimate goal: full body acceptance.
Here, I've outlined a three step process to integrate both the positive thoughts about your individual body parts and the functionality of your body, as well as to advance positive awareness for the parts of the body which you once thought about unfavorably.

Gratitude
The first step in the process of integrative positive self awareness is gratitude. It is important for the flourishing of positive body awareness and growth that you establish a sense of gratitude for where you are in the moment and what shape and form your body is in right now. In my opinion, this moves the focus off of the appearance of your body and shifts the awareness to its functionality.

During this first step, take time to appreciate the gifts your body has given you right now. Some questions to meditate upon include:

• What are the gifts that I have been given?
• Do I acknowledge my gifts and appreciate them for the uniqueness that they hold?
• Am I grateful for my gifts?

I believe that we are all given unique talents and gifts from the universe in order to complete our divine purpose. I also believe that we flourish when we use these talents we have been blessed with. With respect to the body, however, think for a moment: What unique qualities does my body possess? Take a few moments each day to say "thank you" by using these particular parts of yourself. If you need a checkpoint: Make note in your journal of your specific talents and the ways in which you use them.

Creating Affirmations
In effort to show love and reverence for your body, I love to use this secret weapon: affirmations. What I love about affirmations is, they put the energy of the universe in motion based on your desire. Therefore, to nurture a positive reverence for your body, use this step as an exercise, as well. Here's how: Take the gifts you have noted above and create positive statements about them.

For example:

• Thank you for giving me the ability to write - I am so grateful!
• Thank you for giving me strong fingers with which to type!

After you have completed your gratitude list, there is a second part of the equation necessary of your consideration: Are you making time to use your gifts? As I've said before, I believe that when we use our gifts, the universe smiles. I believe this is the most important part in our growth - utilizing our own gifts.

Make a note of affirmation to yourself in your journal: "Today I will find a way to utilize the talents for which I have been given." Then, look for the subtle opportunities. Continue by making a list of ways you could contribute to the world with what you have to offer. I believe you will find what you focus on expands. You may even realize gifts you never knew you had!

Where the body is concerned, you can also use affirmations to turn your perceived subordinate body parts into strong and positive ones. Do this by becoming aware of your self talk. Are there parts of yourself for which you exude negativity? Turn these negatives to positives. Again, in your journal, practice positive self talk.

• My body supports me, I love my body
• My legs are strong and secure they support me, I love my legs

Continuing The Process: Find Your Personal Best
It is important to make a constant and consistent effort to be aware of your body and speak to it in a positive manner. I believe the best and most concise way to do this is through your journal. A journal is your connection to the divine. When you write words on a page, tell yourself that you are sending a message to the universe, a memo to the divine.

Moreover, when you take time to reflect on yourself remember: You are the only you there is. Make an effort to find your own personal best. Make a game of it: Find the clothes you enjoy wearing and the activities you enjoy doing. It is important to be true to yourself in all that you do. Make this a fun process of self discovery… the discovery of you!

In conclusion, continue your process of journaling and inventorying your body. Each day as you wake, thank your body for all the beauty and grace it provides. Love your body by being good to it, by resting it, exercising and practicing positive self talk. If you take care of your body be assured, it will take care of you.

Journal Exercises

• In your journal choose 5 body parts you would like to focus on today
• Create positive affirmative statements for each body part
• Copy your affirmations to cards and carry them in your purse or wallet. When you get a free moment in your day, take time to pull out the cards and read the affirmations aloud or to yourself.



About the Author: Laura Turner is a natural health practitioner and author. She hosts www.beauty-and-body.com and publishes the New Body News and Wellness Letter, The Online Magazine Healthy People Read. ( www.new-body-news.com ) Subscribe for f.r.e.e. and receive her Special Report: "Take Charge of Your Health!" and check out her latest book: Spiritual Fitness!

You may think that it’s your conscious mind that determines what your life will be like. You’re told your entire life that if you work hard and apply yourself, you can accomplish anything. If that were true, then everyone would be successful with a nice home, great career, great family and friends, and enough money so that life is not a struggle. But is that the case? Why do some people have those things while others don’t…even those who do work hard and apply themselves? Because it’s not what’s in our conscious mind that determines what our lives will be like…it’s what’s in our subconscious mind.

Your conscious mind has nothing to do with who you are as a person. That’s the mind that analyzes information so you can make decisions. Everything else about you… the decisions you choose to act upon, your desires, destructive habits, the people you attract, your successes and failures all come from your subconscious mind, and that’s the mind you have to use to get the things you want in life.

Your subconscious mind works differently than your conscious mind does. Before you begin to change your life by changing your thoughts, it’s important for you to learn how your subconscious mind works so you use it properly. Here are “The 6 Key Points to Your Subconscious Mind Power”.

1. The Subconscious Mind only thinks in the present. It does not think in the past or the future as the conscious mind can. So when saying affirmations to get something you want, say…”I AM”, of “I HAVE”, not “I’m GOING TO BE”, or “I WILL have”. The second set of examples is about something that will happen in the future. The subconscious mind only gives you what it sees. The key to tricking it into giving you what you want is telling your subconscious mind that you have it NOW. If you say you’ll have it or get it in the future, your subconscious mind will see you as presently NOT having it now, and that’s what it will deliver to you…nothing.

2. The Subconscious Mind does not know the difference between what is real and what is imagined. Have you ever got into a heated argument with someone and noticed that your heart started to beat quickly? It was your subconscious mind – which controls all your bodily functions – that caused that. Has someone ever made you mad but you were afraid to confront them at the time? So you practiced how you were going to tell them off the next chance you got? Did you notice your heart started to beat faster? Your subconscious mind also caused it because it believed the confrontation was happening. You were only imagining it. But your subconscious mind could not tell the difference.

3. The Subconscious Mind learns by repetition…over and over again. When you learn any new skill, you have to practice it a lot, not a little. When learning to harness the power of your subconscious mind, you’re learning a new skill, so you have to use it over and over again. When you say affirmations to get what you want, you can’t just say them once and expect them to work. You have to say them over and over again until your subconscious mind acts upon them. But as with all skills, the more you use your subconscious mind to get what you want, the easier it works.

4. The Subconscious Mind thinks in infinite or absolute terms, not in finite or partial terms. Let’s say you want to use affirmations to be better in your career. As an example, we’ll say you’re a salesperson. Formulate your affirmation this way: “I’m the greatest salesperson of all time. EVERY prospect I meet becomes a client”. Will you get a sale with EVERY prospect? Most likely not, but maybe 50-75% of the time you will. That’s a great conversion rate. If you affirm…”I turn MOST prospects into clients”, you’ll greatly diminish your results because “MOST” is a partial or finite term or idea in which the subconscious mind does not think.

5. The Subconscious Mind gives you what you want quicker if when saying affirmations you feel the emotion you would feel when you got it. I said earlier that the key to harnessing your mind power is to trick the subconscious mind into thinking that you have what you want NOW. And since the subconscious mind does not know the difference between what is real and what is imagined, pretend you feel happy when you affirm you have what you want. Isn’t that how you would feel if you had it? Just imagine those happy feelings.

6. Your conscious mind is your logical, rational mind. It will never accept an idea that does not make 100% logical, rational sense. If you noticed just 1% of an idea did not make logical sense, you would question it. And you might reject the entire idea if that 1% didn’t make sense. But your Subconscious Mind is your il-logical, or ir-rational mind. It will believe ANYTHING whether it makes logical sense or not. It never questions or analyzes anything you tell it. So when using your subconscious mind to get what you want, set your sights as high as you can…don’t think what you’re affirming doesn’t make logical sense. Your subconscious mind will not think that.

So that’s all you need to know to put your subconscious mind to work. You don’t need to know anything else. But training your subconscious mind to give you what you want takes time and practice. Try to say your affirmation over and over for about 15 to 20 minutes following a good relaxation session of about 5 minutes. The Subconscious Mind is more susceptible to receiving and acting upon suggestions when it’s relaxed. I can’t give you a time frame as to how long it will take you to master your mind power. It depends on how much effort you make and to what degree you believe in it. But I can say that if you give it enough time and effort and believe 100% in the power you already have, you’ll be amazed at how quickly it starts to work.



Todd Wissler has been a student of the Subconscious Mind and human psyche since 1974. He is the author of the ebook..."How To Talk To Your Subconscious Mind". You can get your FREE copy from his website...www.MindPowerAssociates.com

Subliminal messages were prohibited on radio and TV as early as 1974 by the Government of the USA. These were previously used to increase the sales of popcorn by almost 62 percent. This is a topic in a number of Derren Brown "mind" shows that are broadcast around the world.

But in spite of all these media build-up, subliminal messages continue to be widely used by advertisers, not merely to entice us with the purchase of yet another can of coke, but to actually change the way we live.

First of all, you can use subliminals for self-help: you can improve your self-confidence, treat acne, improve your relationships with the opposite sex and much more with the help of special subliminal messaging computer programs. One of such programs is Subliminal Flash (by Ded Pyhto, Inc); you can search it on Google and download for free.

In fact I intend to show you that you can use subliminal message to work for you right from tonight! This technique doesn't require using of subliminal messaging software. It is not as effective as using, saying , Subliminal Flash software mentioned above, but it can demonstrate you the power of subliminals.

But then what exactly are subliminal messages?

Subliminal means below the threshold of consciousness. Subliminal messaging is an act of conveying messages straight to the potent subconscious mind. This section of your brain is in charge of the whole lot from memory to giving your conscious mind its basic traits to that of body temperature.

Dr James Vicary conducted the most significant subliminal messaging in history when he flashed "I want popcorn" and "Drink more coke" for 100-milliseconds to a movie audience. Being below the threshold of consciousness, no one 'saw' these messages; but then sales of popcorn and coke shot up 58.4 % and 19.2% respectively.

But this form of potent suggestive advertisement was banned by The Government of the USA. However on the other hand, the potent nature of this tool was also recognized. This can be a powerful tool to send messages of self-improvement directly to the subconscious minds of the masses.

How are these to be done? There are two ways to send the subliminal messages. The first is visual with the use, for instance, of the Subliminal Flash software tool. The second is audio with the use of subliminal CDs that can be bought off from nearly all bookstores.

There is also this low cost way for you to put to use subliminal messaging.

Identify a pair of important goals that you will like to imbibe in your life. Perhaps you may want to stop smoking or may be learn faster. Put these core goals into very short and simple positive messages like "I am ready to quit smoking" or "I am a quick learner".

Write these messages on to a white cardboard sheet using thick black marker pen. Craft about three such cards with such affirmative messages on the themes. Keep these next to your bed along with a flashlight.

Then comes the unfriendly part. You will be woken up at mid-night when your subconscious is vulnerable.

You set your alarm clock for 4 a.m. before going to sleep. When you hear the alarm clock ring, turn it off. Pick up the affirmation cards and the flashlight. Flash the flashlight in the pitch dark for a dozen times quickly over each of the affirmation card. Simply stare at the cards without any efforts at reading them. These messages are for the subconscious.

Once you have completed this, you may off the light, put off the cards and get back to sleep. All these should not take you more than two minutes. You will surely get back to a deep and restful sleep.

What you have just accomplished is to send a set of subliminal messages to your subconscious. What you are about to experience is something very exciting!

Problem-solving dreams are reported invariably by most when the techniques are used for a few nights. Their decisions are found to be influenced from within. After a week or so, they recognize that their smoking has reduced to half and their speed of learning has had noticeable improvement. You have moved ahead in achieving your core goals.

Subliminal messaging is quite simple to use but have not yet been widely put to use.
Though simple and straightforward, most people do not believe it. You may not think it actually works. Even you may not try this out.

But the fact is that the powerful potent use that this can be put to use is recognized by the Government of the USA.

So may be you will try this out now.



Evgheny Stivenson, author of articles about subliminals and developer of subliminal software

In Search Of SelfBy:
Bonnie
Moss



The human self is a temple of the
Divine.

Life goes on. You can choose to let life flow or get stuck
and just keep spinning your wheels. Each day offers a
chance to look at the brighter side of life and enjoy it. Each day is a chance
to be connected with your divinity. Each day heralds a
new beginning. You have to be part of it.

The world never
stands still. Time comes when battles that were once  critical no longer top the
list of priorities. That is if you learn to  reconcile yourself with the past, sort out
the precious lessons and move on.

Take control of your life, validate yourself, honor and respect your
being and most of all, love yourself. This is not about being
aggressive,domineering and always in control  and confrontational. It is not
about becoming self-absorbed.

Far from it. It is about
offering a more compatible YOU in a  relationship. There are inevitable bumps in
any relationship,  unavoidable falls and pitfalls. No problem lasts forever.
There has to  be a way to adjust your sails and enjoy the breeze,
not get lost in the storm.

Take stock of your life. What are your illusions? What is your reality? How do you deal
with failure, with disappointments and the other  elements that fuel stress? Are
you just coping, mostly in a crisis  management mode? What can you
do?

Sometimes, one's world, one's hopes and dreams come
crashing with a big  bang, a major shaking up of life. This is a chance to take
a great leap  of faith, to grow and strengthen your self-trust that is eroding.
Move on without fear. Fear can be paralyzing. Move on instead with
self-confidence. Have faith in yourself. Faith is
enduring.

Grab the chance to harness the power from the
river of knowledge already flowing through your being, to take that first
step to get up and move on to the next phase. Time  to let go and really let go.
Hanging on to personal loss builds up  powerful negative blocks; these fuel
anger, grief, bitterness,  vindictiveness, distrust, confrontation, erodes
self-confidence - all  negative but very powerful energies. Over time,
accumulation of these  take its toll on your health.

Why
allow a negative influence to knock on the door? Hurtful issues tend to get
remote and forgotten over time. Why dwell on these? Negative  energy gets very
powerful and takes on a life of its own. What purpose  does it serve?
NOTHING.

Take peace over misery any day, any time. In a world of
turmoil,  deception, hypocrisy and insensitivity, not to mention fighting with
  inner demons, peace can be elusive. Believe in the power of love and  peace.
Loving
yourself first enhances your capability to share that
love with others.

Strengthen your personal power. Nurture your
spirit,
let it bring forth deep insight, thus, perspective. Search deep within, bring
out the glitter from within your soul, let it radiate joy and
peace. Help make this a better world.





About the Author: Bonnie Moss writes about
spirituality, tools available to all to walk the path. Visit her website,
a  metaphysical site that offers information on tarot, crystals, aura,  angels
and related topics.Her inspirational articles are published on a  variety of
ezines. Visit her website: goldencupcafe.tripod.com

Nurturing Your SpiritBy:
Bonnie
Moss



Do you ever wonder about the other “YOU
?”

The one that speaks to you quietly, the one that helps you find
  inspiration. It is in your spirit that the feeling of love and peace  reign
supreme. It is where happiness is free to embrace you.

It is the
voice that shouts the emptiness of your life, despite all the trappings of
luxury that you surround yourself with. It is the loneliness that
overwhelms you, calling to you to wake up.  There’s more to life than wallowing
in your misery. It’s your spirit  starved for attention and love.


Ever wonder who you truly share the heights of joy, or the depths of
pain and sorrow,
when everyone else is out of reach? Reach out within yourself.


What gives you strength, courage and empowerment? Why does negative
self-talk feel magnified especially in your solitude?

We all have a
Spirit, if you would stop, listen and nurture it. It will  not lead you astray.
Negative vibrations weigh you down, because the  spirit does not want to have
anything to do
with your negative attitudes. It serves you no purpose. It’s almost
trying to  tell you, Hey, if you pursue this course, you’re on your own. Listen
to  me and I’ll show you a better way.

Do not confuse
connecting
with your spirit with denial.

To
acknowledge your spirit steers you clear of the mental chaos and  confusion that
magnifies the trials, obscures the solutions, clouds your judgment and drags you
deeper in the mire. Denial is the result of  being disconnected with your spirit.


Problems, trials, disappointments are part of life. No matter how dark
  the clouds are, through blizzard, storm and tsunami, the sun always comes up, bright and
warm.

Think about it, ask yourself, how can you nurture your
spirit? This is how I do it:

-Start and end my day with a prayer of
gratitude.
-Meditate, stay grounded and live in the present.
-Today
well-lived makes for a better tomorrow.
-Know that problems are but stepping
stones to better times.
-Count my blessings, share what I can with others.
-Read
inspiring books and quotations.
-Listen to soothing music, play the
piano.
-Appreciate nature’s beauty.
-Know that patience is a virtue,i.e.,
grin and bear it.
-Try to show compassion / kindness, for everyone has their
own battles to fight.
-Let those I love know they are loved everyday.
-Let
bygones be bygones.
-Move on, for there’s nothing I can do about what’s past
but learn from it.

-Dream a bit.





About the Author: Bonnie Moss writes about
spirituality, tools available to all to walk the path. Visit her website, a
metaphysical site that  offers information on tarot, crystals, aura, angels,
journalling and  more. She is the Executive Secretary of Tarot Canada
International, as  well as a regular contributor of articles to the newletter,
Future  Endeavours. Visit her website:goldencupcafe.tripod.com

Bittersweet: When Bad Comes Along With
The GoodBy:
Wendy
Betterini



In life, there are cycles of good
and bad. Times when our lives seem  joyful and easy, and times when we're
struggling through what seem like  endless difficulties. Then there are times
when the two seem to  co-mingle. These are the times I call bittersweet.
Perhaps
you've had a bittersweet period in your own life? Usually it begins
with something wonderful, followed immediately by something awful. You get a great promotion at
work, then
your spouse loses his or her job. Or you finally start making
progress on
your new fitness regime, and you pull a muscle, putting you
out of commission for a week or two. A new baby is born into your family, and then a loved
one passes away suddenly (or sometimes not so suddenly).


Currently, I find myself in a bittersweet period of my own. My husband  and I
recently purchased our first home. This has been a dream of ours  for years, and
we've worked hard to make it happen. Finally the dream  came true, and we moved
into our new home less than two weeks ago, eager to begin a new phase of our
lives.

Then the hammer dropped. In the same week, we received news that
two  family members have been diagnosed with cancer. My husband's uncle, and  my
mother (who also just moved into our new home with us).

During the years
I'd fantasized about what it would be like to have our  dream of homeownership
come true, I never expected a dark shadow to be  cast over the joy of our new
situation. Somehow, I thought it would be  smooth sailing once the hard work was
done and we achieved our goal.

For the first few days after we received
the bad news, I felt somewhat  indignant toward the powers that be. Why now? Why
couldn't we just enjoy the experience of our new home ownership, and deal with
the bad stuff  later? Yes, I admit, such thoughts are selfish, not to mention
futile.  Life doesn't work like that, and the universe doesn't revolve around
our wishes. There will always be difficulties to work through, regardless  of
what else is happening in our lives at the time. We simply have to  carry on,
because there is nothing else to do. Still, I felt like a  petulant child,
pouting because pain, fear, and uncertainty had chosen  this moment to knock on
our door.

A few nights later I was feeling restless, unable to
concentrate on  anything. I was afraid for my loved ones, worried that the
cancer may  have spread, wondering what was going to happen. Finally I decided
to  sort through some still-unpacked boxes to take my mind off my worries.  It
was late and the house was silent and still when I crept out to the  garage. I
began quietly sorting through a box of miscellaneous items  when a wave of
weariness came over me, and I sat down heavily on a  folding chair to collect my
thoughts. In the grip of despair, I reached  out with my heart and mind to the
universe, seeking, asking  for...something. Comfort? Strength? Reassurance?
Guidance? I don't even  know what I needed at that moment, I just reached out
wordlessly from my soul, hoping to get a response that made everything all right
again.

Suddenly my attention was pulled to an item resting just
inside the top  of the box I had been sorting through. It was the corner of a
greeting  card I had tossed into the box in the haste of packing. I reached out
  and pulled on the corner of the card, and as it emerged from the box, I  saw
that the front of it featured a bouquet of flowers and the words,  "thank you".
A flood of warmth washed over me then, flowing through every fiber of  my being,
clearing my mind, lifting my heart, refreshing my spirit. Yes. THANK YOU! That was the answer I had
been seeking.

There, in the cool, quiet garage, I finally
understood that the dark  shadow that had been cast over our lives didn't have
to blot out our  joy. Do we despair when clouds blot out the brilliance of the
sun? No.  We simply continue on with our lives, working, playing, laughing,
  loving. The bitter CAN co-exist with the sweet. I realized that it's a  matter
of perspective, as are so many things in life. It's true that  bitterness has
the power to taint sweetness, but it's also true that  sweetness can ease the
intensity of bitterness. It just depends on which angle you focus on. Thankfully, the
universe found a way to remind me that I have a  choice, and I began focusing
more on gratitude and joy again.

The next morning, my husband and
I had some errands to run, and as we  drove along a street we've traveled
numerous times, I saw a side street  that I'd never noticed before. I glanced up
at the sign and saw that the street name was "Bittersweet Lane." Honestly, it
didn't look like a bad place to live. :-)





About the Author: Wendy Betterini is a freelance writer
specializing in self-improvement and personal development concepts. Visit her
website, www.WingsForTheHeart.com
for free articles on positive thinking, goal-setting, self-esteem, personal
growth, and
more.

Blessings Upon YouBy:
Wendy
Betterini



I find myself thinking about
blessings a lot lately; more specifically, the concept of feeling
blessed.

In a recent article, I wrote
about
the bittersweet periods in life when we find ourselves
struggling through difficulties at the same time we’re
experiencing moments of joy, and the importance of focusing more on
the
happiness and gratitude we feel rather than pain and
fear.

After a couple of weeks consistently focusing more on blessings and gratitude, I’m
beginning to see that amazing things happen when we do this. First and foremost,
our difficulties don’t seem so overwhelming
anymore. They’re still there of course, but choosing not to
dwell on them sure does dim their power.


Secondly,
focusing more
on our blessings strengthens and energizes us. Rather
than feeling like a victim, we feel empowered and inspired. Even  better, we
feel motivated to reach out and share our joyful feelings  with others. Doing this in even subtle
ways can still make a powerful difference in the world.


Have you ever blessed someone silently? For as long as I can remember, I’ve prayed
for people I don’t
know. I’m not sure where I picked up the habit, but I routinely send
out blessings and positive thoughts for the people I encounter each day.
I bless
the jogger making his way through heavy traffic, and ask the universe to protect and
guide him in all he does. I bless the harried mother in the supermarket and ask for her
to be infused with patience and endurance so she can  raise healthy, happy
children – and keep her sanity in the process! I bless the children playing near the
street and ask angels to protect them from
harm.

Because I’m such a big animal
lover, I also make a habit of routinely blessing our
four-footed friends. Yesterday, I blessed a squirrel that was busily
gathering
fallen acorns from the trees in my backyard. I
doubt he noticed, but I felt inspired to send out some positive
thoughts
on his behalf. (Or was it a she? I forgot to ask.) Anyway, I
blessed him and wished him an abundance of nuts and a warm nest to sustain
him and his family through the coming
winter.

It might sound funny, blessing a squirrel.
However, if you stop to think about it on a deeper level, it’s not so
strange. Because we’re all interconnected on a spiritual level, why
not bless
the squirrels, the trees, the birds, and every other living
thing?

It feels good to send out positive
thoughts to others.
Remember,
the universe is a great big mirror. Everything we send out, we get back
in some form. So blessing others makes sense not just
because it makes us feel good, but because we receive the same quality of energy we send out. Finally,
keeping ourselves in that place of joy and gratitude where
blessings come from keeps us focused on positive thoughts,
rather than negative. Positive
thoughts keep our vibrations high, which results in
greater feelings
of compassion, love, joy, and
happiness.

It is also just as important to bless ourselves
as it is to bless others! How do we do this? By
speaking kindly to ourselves, treating ourselves with the respect and love we show
others, and by creating lives that
are meaningful and fulfilling.

Want to take this a step
further? Several times
throughout your day, as often as you can,
repeat
these words: “I am so blessed. Wow, I am so incredibly blessed! I
love my
life, and I’m so grateful for everything I have.” Really let yourself
feel those words, and speak them from the heart.


It may take a little time, but this practice can begin to
shift
the circumstances of your life in miraculous ways. You’ll
begin to feel better, look better, relate to others better, and attract
so many blessings into your life that you won’t know what to do
with
them all!

In the meantime, I’m sending
out some blessings to you and yours to help get you started. May you receive
everything you dream of, plus a little extra.
:-)





About the Author: Wendy Betterini is a
freelance writer specializing in self-improvement and personal development concepts. Visit her website,
www.WingsForTheHeart.com
for free articles
on positive thinking, goal-setting, self-esteem, personal growth, and
more.

Detours On The Path Of
LifeBy: Wendy
Betterini



The other day I was clearing out my
home office in preparation for our  upcoming move, when I stumbled upon a box of
supplies left over from an  old business opportunity I had undertaken several
years ago. It was a  perfectly fine business opportunity, but it wasn't for me.
Looking back, I knew even then that it wasn't right for me, but I had
determinedly  ignored my inner voice and pursued it anyway.


As I sorted through this box of paperwork and supplies, I felt my face flame
with embarrassment and regret. How could I have been
so stupid to think I could ignore my true calling and pursue another path because it
seemed easier at the time? Evidence that  revealed how hard I had tried to make
it work was strewn throughout the  box: records of appointments and training classes I'd attended,
brochures I'd designed, sales letters I had painstakingly written, and even motivational notes I'd
written to encourage myself to keep going.

It's an
uncomfortable feeling, facing a box full of regrets. I thought  about all the
time I'd wasted on that business opportunity, and wondered where I'd be today if
I had just listened to my inner calling from the beginning.


As I began emptying the box and shredding old paperwork, I
began to feel a little lighter and my thoughts began to drift. Was
the time I spent on that business  opportunity really wasted? In hindsight, I
can see that it wasn't. I  learned so much from that experience, some of it
having to do with  business - but mostly about myself. Even though it wasn't my
true  calling, I would still have to acknowledge that it was time well-spent. I
simply took a detour on my life path. Perhaps my reasons (fear and denial) weren't the most lofty,
but the experience was no less valuable.

Perhaps you have a
box full of regrets hidden in your closet, even if only on an
emotional level. Do you regret jobs you've held in  the past, or relationships
you clung to even when they didn't seem to  contribute anything of value to your
life? Do you wish you had gone to college when you were younger, or do
you  wish you had chosen another major? Are there choices you made in the  past
that make you cringe with embarrassment now?

Most of us have
a tendency to be really hard on ourselves, expecting perfection and nothing less. But it's
unrealistic to expect ourselves to make perfect  decisions every single time.
There are too many unknown factors that  could come into play, and even when we're absolutely sure
we're making the right choice, it might not turn out the way we
expected.

When you stop to think about it, there really
aren't any right or wrong  decisions in life. Each choice simply moves us down a
different path,
and we can learn something valuable from each of them. Just because
something  didn't work out like we thought it would doesn't mean it wasn't
  worthwhile.

However, in my experience, the journey becomes
much more enjoyable if we take the time to listen to our heart. When we let our
inner voice guide us to the choices that feel most right, that's when the real
magic  begins to happen. Our lessons become richer and more meaningful. We feel a
sense of excitement and inspiration as we embark on a
new pathway with each choice we make. Even our  "mistakes" seem more valuable,
if not downright funny. We can laugh at  our foibles and learn from them. Most
importantly, we realize that the journey itself is the destination.


As the saying goes, "hindsight is 20/20". Our vision is much
clearer  when we look back with the knowledge we have today. But if we always
had the ability to see the big picture, wouldn't that defeat the purpose of a
life spent learning and growing? We're not supposed to
have all the answers right now. I think many of us tend to forget that from time to
time.

My box of regrets is gone now, and in fact, I no longer see them
as regrets. Instead, I've got a big empty  box that I'm eager to start filling
with new experiences. Will I look  back and feel red-faced about them at a
future time? Possibly. Or maybe I'll simply smile and be grateful for the chance to
learn and
grow some more. :-)





About the Author: Wendy Betterini is
a freelance writer specializing in self-improvement and personal development concepts.
Visit her website, www.WingsForTheHeart.com for free articles
on positive thinking, goal-setting, self-esteem, personal growth, and
more.

Forget Your “Life's Purpose”
And Live Your Life
PurposefullyBy: Tama J.
Kieves



Sam called me recently for a coaching session to help him find his
“life’s purpose.”
According to him, he’d taken classes, attended retreats, listened to tapes, talked to counselors, read books, treatises, and tea leaves, channeled and chanted, did his numerology and astrology, researched, and still, like a sly red fox, his “life’s purpose”
had
swished its tail and
escaped him. “I’m almost 50 and I still don’t know what I want to do with my life,” he spat
across the phone lines. I felt this sense of meaninglessness crushing down upon
him.

And I found myself saying something pretty unusual, given
that I’m the queen of helping people find their
callings. “Forget your “life’s purpose”
and live your life purposefully,” I
said. I’ll say it to you, too. Really, if you’ve looked that hard, then stop looking and let something find
you.

Finding a calling isn’t like finding a needle in a haystack. It’s more like being a fish and naming the water you swim in. Relax. You already have it. Just start loving what you love. If nothing compels you
to leap forward, then leap where you are. Leap into your present
life.

Sam was so consumed with the thought
that there was some big IT out there that he made himself feel empty and useless. He had good friends, a garden, a cat and an aging mother who loved to send him
clippings from her local church bulletin. He was learning to do tai chi and he was helping his neighbor find a
job. But none of that counted, he said.

Sam was holding out for the lightning
bolt,
and nothing we talked about seemed big and grand enough to be a “life’s purpose.” He wanted passion, frenzy, a drum roll, and a comet searing the sky with his full name in
stars, complete with middle initial.
But life is
often fuzzier than that. Your purpose can be simple and pure, and so natural to you, that it sometimes feels ordinary or like water to a fish.



Your purpose can also start out with a small action or gesture. Passion can begin like a trickle of rain before it turns into a raging river.


Searching can also be a way of avoiding making a choice. Yet making choices will help you gain the
experience you need with which to make further distinctions and decisions.


Years ago, I was in a relationship and I didn’t want to leave, but I didn’t want to commit to it either. I just
wasn’t sure he was “the one.” I kept thinking
that maybe there was some one more arresting or spellbinding out
there.
After
all, I went to the movies and I knew that everyone else was making love on their kitchen
counters
and dancing
cheek to cheek in mists and moonlight. So I kept doubting
my choice--and doubting kept me from making a choice.


Fortunately I found a couples therapist who really loved his wife and wanted others to love their partners
just
as much. I told him that I was afraid that if I committed to the relationship, I’d miss out on
something. He looked me in the eyes, grinned, and said the words that changed my life. “You’re missing out
right now,” he said.
“You’re with this guy over here, only you’re not experiencing everything this
relationship has to give you. You haven’t sat down at the table to have a meal. You’ve just looked at the menu. No wonder you’re still
hungry.” Wow, talk about
fireworks.

I realized that I had been a ghost in my life, not fully
present in
anything. I was expecting to be grabbed by something. But that’s not how it works. First we
grab, then we’re grabbed.

So here’s
my quick take on finding your life’s purpose. If you
have something that whispers to or nudges you,
by
all means
run to it
as fast as you can. If you’re just
beginning
your search, keep your mind and heart open. Be aware of the tendency to discount
what you love—or tell yourself it’s no big deal and
that you could never make a living that way. Take lots of personal space to listen to your soul.


But if you feel as though you’ve been searching for a while and just spinning your wheels, then
here’s
another spin. Stop looking and start loving. Quit living on the
outskirts
of your
life, and go to town. Appreciate the roses in your garden, the mail person, the fact that your car runs, and the comfort of your favorite chair. Take good care of the people in your life. Practice
treating everyone, especially yourself, with
reverence
and kindness.

Enter your life as though it’s the only one you’ll
ever have. The moment you approach anything with care, compassion, connection, and attention, you're on the road to
purpose
and passion.


 


About the Author: Tama J. Kieves is the best-selling
author of THIS TIME I DANCE! Creating the Work You Love/How One
Harvard Lawyer Left It All to Have It All! She is also a sought-after speaker and career coach who has helped thousands world-wide to discover and live their creative dreams. Learn more about Tama’s workshops and coaching or sign up to receive FREE
monthly inspiration
and tools for your creative life journey at www.AwakeningArtistry.com.
Download her free report on
“Finding
Your Calling
Now.”